Modern Goddess Magazine

I was probably one of millions of American girls that grew up in the 70’s and desperately wanted to be Wonder Woman. I mean, even to this day, who doesn’t identify Linda Carter as that amazing beauty of a woman in a crown, boots and a red, white and blue body suit?

When I was in my twenties I exercised every day and I was very fit. I hoped that maker’s of movies would decide to make the next superhero movie a Wonder Woman movie. I was convinced that, with a little help from Bausch & Lomb in order to get blue eyes, I could be the next Linda Carter!

Well, Hollywood never called and suddenly (over a ten year period) four children appeared in my life. My hopes of ever being Wonder Woman were dashed, but a strange thing occurred. Slowly, each month, each year I began to develop real life super powers!

One of the very first changes is the super power hearing. You’re able to hear small children getting into trouble even when you have the blender going and they’re outside! Your eyes open wide and you cock your head to the side to listen carefully and sure enough you can hear them whispering and conspiring through the walls about their devious plans!

There are some very powerful aspects of this super hearing. The first is not only are you able to hear every wayward crinkle and snap that they make, but you are also keenly aware that silence means trouble. You’re not actually able to leap over tall buildings in a single bound in order to get to where they are, but woe it is to anyone that gets in your path as you’re running!

Thankfully, the super hearing can be turned off. Wonder Woman needed to go to her home of Amazon women every once in awhile to restore herself. A mom just develops the skill to tune it all out sometimes.

There were always some great scenes in that show where Wonder Woman would lift a car or tear open a wire gate with her super strength. Who knew that I’d be able to roll giant boulders that were crushing a child’s leg or push a 125 pound dog that had decided to sit on a baby?

Wonder Woman could use her super vision to see through buildings or sometimes she could even see people a great distance away. As it turns out, I have this power too! I should have been ready for this one though, since I always thought that my own mother had eyes behind her head. It drives my children crazy, but it’s always worth a good laugh when they notice that I have caught them at something that they thought I’d never be able to see!

Just like Wonder Woman I stand up for right and wrong among my tribe. I fight for the things I believe in and teach my children to cheer for an underdog if they have the chance.

I can’t remember if Wonder Woman had a super sense of smell, but there never has been a mother that couldn’t smell a dirty diaper from a fabulously far distance. Even better is that this sense of smell picks up smoke faster than a smoke detector can go off, or the smell of a gas leak or even when the pet has had an accident in the house. It’s a very handy super power.

It seems that mother’s have been given a few things that even Wonder Woman didn’t get to have. For example, my kisses have the magic power to make tears disappear and to diminish the pain of booboos and bellyaches. My hugs go a long way toward calming my children’s cries of injustice and just one of my words can either brighten or destroy an entire day for those that I love!

So I’m not going to be the next Linda Carter. I’ll never even get to wear that nifty suit unless I have the nerve to put it on for a Halloween party, but as it turns out, just like every other mother that I know, I’m wonder woman anyway. Oh, and if I ever wear that suit on Halloween, I’d develop the power to make my children moan, groan and roll their eyes to the back of their heads!